The journey of healing demands patience and practice coupled with endurance to face a few (maybe more) difficult moments that will leave you weak and wanting to quit. While dealing with our personal struggles, we often distract ourselves by being sympathetic and helpful to others. But it’s time to empathize with yourself and heal yourself, as it’s often said, ‘Charity Begins at Home’. Let’s walk you through a few steps that you can take, in order to start your healing journey. Hope you are ready for a good time and a cherishing life.
1. You are Hurting, Accept It
You would have already taken the first step towards healing if you have acknowledged and accepted the fact that you are hurting. The irony of an emotional struggle is that most of us are unaware of its existence, others refuse to accept that they are going through one. ‘The first step towards change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.’ – Nathaniel Branden Often, suffering is the result of a combination of pain and non-acceptance. Once you have been through a trauma, pain is inescapable, but it is not necessary for you to suffer. When you are at your lowest, friends and family may remark upon a weird change in your behaviour. Remember to not create a shell for yourself where you choose to hide silently and hurt. What you must be considering is a step towards healing. This step is acceptance of the pain and being ready to deal with it. There might be numerous resources available for help but it is you who has to take the first step to come out of your shell. Accept your existence, accept who you are, personally.
2. Explore Yourself
The word “explore” has different meanings and techniques to go about it. Once you have taken the first step towards healing, it is time to take the leap of faith. Faith in yourself. Whom do you trust? Someone who you know inside out and the one who is confident of himself. Be that person. To do so, you will need to explore and know yourself better. Which all things trigger your emotions, what makes you happy, what do you adore, what do you abhor? Your wants and wishes. Your wounds and scars. Speak to yourself about them all. If you want, write them down. This will help you reconcile and declutter your mind.
3. Time to Drop the Baggage and Move On
In the above point, we talked about exploring yourself. It’s about time you drop the baggage of your past and get to know yourself better. Face the clutter in your mind, accept what you can and let go of the rest. Make room for more affirmations and manifestations from the changed and better version of yourself. We keep reliving our worst phases and past, in our head all the time. How long will you traumatise yourself for the same incident? Let’s cry for one last time, feel the pain one last time and then move on with experience for future. Assure yourself that a great time is waiting for you.
4. Cut out Toxic Connections & Relations
A critical phase is momentary, but toxic relationships make life a permanently terrible phase. Some connections might be the cause of the bliss in your life, but they could also pave a path for some permanent damages in the long run. Identify the toxic connections in your life and learn to handle or distance your emotions from them. Be firm and persistent in keeping them away as cutting ties is often a long driven process. If such persons are in the habit of disrespecting your boundaries, they will resist but you must keep pushing them back. Use the time you have away, from the unhealthy relationships, for a mental floss. Use it up for building a positive mindset and gaining company that uplifts you and resonates with your aspirations.
5. Start loving yourself
If we ask you to list down the people you love the most, how long will it take to write your name? Do you even fall in the list? Well, if you don’t, you should. Prioritizing yourself and your happiness must not be mistaken for selfishness. Self-love is all about having a healthy self-esteem and not ego and conceit. Self-love can be your best friend who stands by you and reaffirms your faith in yourself through tough times. Instead of finding happiness in another person, let that person be you. When you love yourself, you surround yourself with an energy that no one can take from you. Also read: Build Your Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
6. Don’t Get too Attached to Everyone
Loving and caring for your kin is a nice thing to do. Agree, but in this process, one must not get emotionally drained to an extent that their farewell gets difficult to handle. Most of us love our partners or friends so much that even a little instability disturbs our peace of mind. We overthink, recollect circumstances and create scars for ourselves. Keep yourself on the top of your priority list. It is totally fine to love people and keep them at an arm’s distance so that they don’t disturb your peace. Try this and trust us, you’ll be unshakeable. When we talk about starting your healing journey, it’s important to understand that you will need to alter your mindset and behaviour and this step is one of them, dear friend.
7. A shift in priorities
Have you ever regretted saying no? Most of us are unable to gather the courage to say no or regret doing it when we do. It’s because we’re prioritizing others above ourselves. But why do we do so? Prioritizing yourself doesn’t mean hurting someone or loving them less. It simply means that you love yourself more and keep yourself above them. If you practice this with no regrets, you’ll be way ahead in the journey of healing. ‘Make your Priorities a Priority. Know what matters most to you and be unwilling to compromise those priorities at almost any cost.’- Frank Sonnenberg
8. Find a purpose
While dealing with your sufferings, we often forget the purpose and aim of our life. We must often revisit and reshuffle our defined purpose and goals of life, think about what we really want – not just professionally but personally too. It has been studied and proved by psychiatrists that a sense of purpose continuously evolves humans and is associated with better mental and physical health. On the other hand, a crisis of purpose indicates isolation and lack of a sense of community which is not ideal for human existence. Also read: Most Important Reasons to Try Yoga
9. Seek Help
All the above self-help steps will only show positive results if you are mentally ready for the same. If the ideas seem overwhelming, there is nothing wrong with seeking help. Talk to your near and dear ones and feel free to do so. Take counseling, if you need to, to heal your soul. A professional mental health expert or a psychotherapist near you will know what’s the best plan for you. They can help you find what you couldn’t and resolve the conflicts within you. The most important thing to keep in mind before getting started with your healing journey is that you must maintain a strong willpower. Any effort of self-help must be coupled with willpower for consistency. External help in the form of counseling and therapy also lays emphasis on motivation to achieve mental health. If you hold a strong willpower, you can overcome all the challenges that are roadblocks on the path of your healing journey.
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